Looking back, and after doing much reading from many MS related sites, it seems I may have some early symptoms for some time, but as is often the case, these symptoms were put down as other things (and maybe rightly so). This includes near continuous head-aches, lower back pain - usually on the left side, 'high' and 'low' mood swings, and the dreaded itchy skin - mainly at night. Most of these symptoms have appeared over the last 3-4 years, and have usually been contributed to my stress levels, or the beginning of menopause, neither of which was proven, just assumed.

One Monday in mid October 2004, I developed a bad cramp in my left calf muscle while going to my car to drive to work. I stretched the leg, gave it a quick massage, and continued on my way. By the time I arrived at work, the muscle was still sore, and I was limping. It continued throughout the day, although I tried to rest my leg as much as possible (not an easy task in my workplace). This continued for several days, but me being me, didn't give it much thought. Over the week, I also found I wasn’t sleeping well, and had another one of my head-aches. By Friday, I was very tired, and my left leg still seemed sore and weak, I also noticed that my left arm was aching, although I didn’t pay much attention to it, I was too busy to worry about me. I tried to rest over the weekend;but there were always things to do. (I’m not very good at saying 'no').

On Monday, I was feeling really 'down' and very tired, but I dragged myself off to work. When I arrived, a workmate said I should go home. Eventually she got me to make a Doctor's appointment for the next afternoon, and at about lunchtime I went home. When I arrived home,I laid on the couch to rest, and slept for 4 hours. I woke still feeling tired, my leg was weak and unsteady, and my arm seemed weak too. I ate dinner and went to bed, sleeping most of the night. This was very unusual for me, as I normally function well on 4 -6 hours sleep a night. By this time I realised there was something definitely wrong, and I was glad I was seeing the Doctor.

The Doctor also noticed that my speech was slight slurred, and the left side of my mouth was slightly dropped. By this stage, we were all thinking 'stroke'. I was sent off for a CAT scan - clear. Next came blood tests, a full chest x-ray and an ECG - clear. I was finding out that I was healthy in all these areas, but my symptoms were getting worse, it was an effort just to shower and dress now. Finally a MRI was ordered, this showed 4 small lesions - so now it was suggested that it maybe MS. I was booked into the Neuro Unit of a local hospital for assessment, and possible treatment.

I was given an IV coarse of Methylprednisolone over 3 days, and I was much improved, although I wouldn’t say 'back to normal'. Back home, I took things easy, but after a few days, I noticed that my symptoms were returning. By the time I had been home for a week, things were worse than ever, so I went back into hospital. After another IV treatment, there was some improvement but not as dramatic as before.I had a Lumber Pucture and vision tests done, both came back as normal, and the Neuro said that this was unusual in MS cases, but not unheard of during the early stages. After being told that yes, I did have MS (early stages and mild at this stage), I was given some physiotherapy exercises and sent home. It was arranged for me to have weekly visits at home from a physiotherapist and an occupational therapist, as I was unable to drive to appointments etc.

At this stage, I was still unsteady on my feet, but didn’t need any aids to walk; I needed a shower stool to shower, had trouble dressing, and couldn’t walk very far and was very slow. I also couldn’t use my left arm/hand for much because of the weakness. I also had co-ordination problems with my left arm/hand/fingers which made many tasks difficult. (thankfully Im right handed),

It is now the start of January 2005, and through the physio exercises I’ve slowly regained some of my strength and co-ordination, however, I’m still unable to resume driving and work, and there are still many tasks I have some problems with. As yet I don’t know what type of MS I have, they tell me to wait and see if I have another 'episode'. The Doctors at the Neuro Unit are undecided as to if I’ve had 1 episode that improved then declined, or if I’ve had 2 separate episodes close together. I suppose time while tell.

So far I’m not taking drugs, have tried to change my eating habits to a healthier diet, and am trying to keep a positive attitude most of the time. I’m also very thankful for my family and friends who are being very supportive, and help keep me smiling.

The things that I’m finding hardest to cope with at the moment are the fatigue and the itchiness. I can be tired when I go to bed, start to relax and doze, then the itchiness starts, and sometimes 'jumping' or 'twitching' in the arm or leg.... ARGGGHHHHHH... I’m wide awake again, and cant get comfortable to sleep.

Im learning to say 'no', or 'now/today' is not a good time for me', and Im also learning to ask for help when Im not coping with something.

It is now mid- February 2005, my physiotherapist and O/T have both said that they are pleased with the progress I've made, and they dont think I need their services now. I'm able to continue the exercise program that we have jointly planned, and contact my GP if I have any other concerns. I'm able to contact my Physiotherapist or O/T, if needed.

I have also met with my Manager from work, and we have identified several workplace tasks that I'm able to cope with, and depending on several factors, I hope to be back at work soon after Easter this year. The plan is to start 2 days a week, and hopefully build on that. I personally doubt that I will be able go back to work fulltime,in the same job, but never say never. I've just had my GP fill-out the form notifing VicRoads of my MS, and have been 'cleared' to drive.  This will certainly make life easier for me, but I will be careful to only drive when and where I feel confident, Im not taking any un-necessary risks. But it does mean I'm one step closer to getting back to work.

I'm still finding the fatigue during the day is my hardest thing to accept and deal with. This is not helped by the restless nights due to the 'itchies' and 'twitchies'. I have an appointment with me Neurologist in a couple of weeks time, so will up-date with any news soon.

Update time: Tue 26/4/05 - Ive been to see my Neurologist, and had another MRI done.  The Neuro has stated that he believes Ive only had the one episode so far, and that 'officially' he cant fully diagnose MS until Ive had another attack.  He ordered another MRI to be done, as a comparison to the one I had done last October.  I havent heard any results yet, but have another Neuro appt at the end of June.

Ive also had another meeting with my work manager, and she has met with HR from our headoffice.  At this stage, its not looking too good in regards to me getting back to work.  HR has alot of questions they need answered before they are satisfied that Im not 'too high' a risk.  Although I can understand this, it doesnt make it any easier to accept.  So now Im trying to work out my options for gaining some form of 'meaningful' employment in case I cant go back to my usual job.

UPDATE: Thurs 16/5/05

Last Saturday, I had a strange, numb sort of feeling around my lips, by Sunday, this feeling had spread up my face and forehead, starting to go into my hairline.  This was all on my right side of the face/head.

On Monday, things hadnt improved, so I phoned my GP.  He advised me to go to the Hospital to have it checked.

After spending some time in Casulity, I was seen by one of the Neurology Team.  It seems that I maybe having another 'MS episode'

After some discussion with other Doctors, it was thought I was better off going home, rather than being admitted for treatment, as my symptoms were rather mild.  I was told to report back to the hospital if things felt worse, or if I was worried about anything.

Since then, I feel as if things are improving, and some of the strange feeling has lessened.  I have an appointment to see the Neurologist at the end of June, so will hopefully get a 'proper' diagnosis and more information when I see him.  I havent had any formal report regarding my MRI as yet, but the guy from the Neuro Team mentioned that there seemed to be more small legions that have shown on the second MRI, and it will be fully discussed with me at my Neurology appointment.  Maybe I will get the formal diagnosis.....

In the meantime, Im still trying to get back to work, and have now been placed with CRS to act as advocates and mediators with my workplace & Head Office to try and make my return to work smooth and rewarding for everyone concerned.  Im also busy on the homefront with some Little Athletics work, my daughter is turning 18, so its party time, and we are also looking at moving sometime over the next few months, renting again....... this house has become too expensive for us to stay on much longer.  Its hard to manage on the Centrelink payments, so moving to a smaller, cheaper place is our best option at the moment.

Update - Sunday 9/7/05:

On June 30th, I saw my Neurolgist again, and got the confirmation of MS.  At least any doubts are now gone, and I know for sure what Im dealing with.  I complained about the 'itching and twitching' which had become worse and often keeping me awake at night.

I was prescribed Tegretol tabs to be taken just before bedtime.  These have been working great, so far.  Apparently, Im still 'twitching' slightly in my sleep, but not enough to wake me, or keep Dave awake, so we think this  is a big improvement. My Neurologist also discussed with us about other medication options and gave me some material to read, with a view of making a decision next visit if I want to go on meds or not, and if so, which one.My next appt is early September, and so far Ive made no decision.

UPDATE OCTOBER 2005:

I decided to go onto the Betaferon injections.  The MS nurse has been great, and explained everything clearly.  Im now doing the injections 3 times a week, and its getting easier each time.  I just hope that the drugs help me and that I dont get any more bad relapses.

UPDATE NOVEMBER 2005:

It has been decided that I will not be returning to my workplace, a bit dissappointing, but probably for the best in the long run.  Im under CRS for job hunting and possible retraining, so Im not giving up just yet.

We had a busy month in November, Megan finished her VCE (Year 12), we moved house, and on a sad note - my Mum passed away! Naturally, my MS symptoms decided to make themselves felt, but I think we all coped rather well.

I will continue to update this site as needed.

My journey with MS continues............ and I will add to this site as I can. On this site, I have included some hints and tips I've found useful in coping with life since my diagnoses, and Links to other helpful sites, I hope someone else finds them helpful too!